Here I am Lord. I come to you with all my issues. It’s taken me about a week and ½ to do as I promised I would. I said I’d get up at 5:30 every day to have some quiet time with You. I hit the snooze only once this am instead of turning the alarm completely off. I got up to make my coffee and folded only one load of laundry while it brewed. It was after that the distractions came in. Facebook, a book I could read, the TV, a workout show…I really should work out…so here I sit, 20 minutes later, the kids will be up sooner rather than later, as they always are when I try to purposely spend time with You. The distractions come and the distractions go, but God, You are the One Who loves forever. There is none like You and never will be. I am Yours, You are mine. I will not waver in my faith because You remain Who You are. I seek Your face, i.e. make an effort that may not look like much to some, but many, especially mama’s know, is a valiant one. It’s absolutely nothing compared to what you did for me, and yet it’s a sacrifice. Sleep is precious to me, but not as precious as hearing from You. I want You to know that today God and remind me that no matter what my health looks like, no matter what I look like, no matter how real things get with loved ones’ health issues, no matter how bratty the kids act, no matter the “cost” of turning off the TV and turning the pages of Your Word instead, I will never leave Your side. You are Who I turn to. I’ve tried turning to so many other things that only left me empty as I tried to fill up. So amidst the piles of laundry, dirty dishes, woman doing yoga on TV like I only wish I could, emails that need to be responded to, faxes that need to be sent, all the distractions that have the potential to draw me away, I sit here, firmly planted, ready to hear from You as I type these words. There is nothing You can’t do, nothing too big for You, and no thing that can take us down if we look to You for help. Not lack of work (How exactly will we pay this bill?), not disappointments (Did my kid really just say that to my face?), not lesions or tumors (cancer sucks), not missing loved ones (Oh, how I miss you, Granny), and certainly not the chores around the house (those are too long to list here). I can do nothing without You and I thank You for the reminder.
*I’m not one to post prayers (if that is indeed what this is…) as I think that’s between you and God and I don’t think the world needs to know everything, but I needed to make this declaration today: God is bigger than what You’re facing. He is bigger than what I am facing. There will be an end to the pain and suffering. There is a heaven. There is a hell. You may feel you are in the latter now. Go ahead and feel that way, but keep this in the back of your mind: God is bigger.