Just When…


Have you ever been dealing with something that you just couldn’t quite put your finger on? You think to yourself, surely someone else has been through this, or surely there’s a book on this subject I need to read, or maybe, just maybe, I need to pray about it and let God deal with it?


 I had an odd revelation such as this the other day and it involves resentment. I was able to put this title to it after weeks of battling it. Resentment. Sure doesn’t sound pretty. I realized, however, that I didn’t know who it was or what it was that I was resentful toward. Just for time’s sake alone, I think I’ll direct this toward the enemy of our souls.


We’re always dealing with some issue in this life. After all, that’s what life is: a WHOLE expansive lot of issues. Maybe a death in the family here, a broken whatever there (dishwasher, car, LEG, etc.), a sick child. The list can continue forever. Literally. However, when these things happen in a short span of time, resentment and anger can take hold of your arm like a mad grandma and make you feel disgusted by it all. Isn’t it strange when we need to have the best attitude, we demonstrate the worst? After all, we’re CHRISTIANS, right?? We’re supposed to have it all together! Faith, hope, and love throughout every situation!! I gotta tell you, even as I type that, my whole body kind of collapsed and my brain (and face) said, “Blah, blah, blah.” (It’s ok, God knows me. He knows what I think before I think it, so I can share these kinds of feelings.)


I’m angry that these things have happened! To me! And my family! Have you ever uttered the phrase, “Just when…?” As in, “JUST when we were getting our bills paid!” “JUST when we were on the right track!!” “JUST when I was feeling GREAT!”


This is no coinky-dink, my cherished brothers and sisters! God’s timing is perfect. And what I’ve found is that the enemy’s isn’t bad either. (I heard a gasp somewhere out there…a compliment?? To the devil?? Ok, maybe the gasp was in my own mind.) It’s not often that I throw any sort of complimentary statement the enemy’s way, but this one is the truth. He stalks about, pacing, unhappy, looking around to see who he can devour and destroy with his ways. (1 Peter 5:8) God warns us to stay alert and self-controlled. This maaaaaay have been the point where I lost it in the past few weeks. Self control. Let’s just leave it at “I’m workin’ on it.” I’m thinkin’ resentment and anger just might creep in if we don’t remain in control of ourselves and our minds.


I thank God for his patience, understanding, love, and crazy-awesome mercy today. I don’t know why He does it, but He continues to love me throughout every one of my issues and crises. Life continues as well—it continues to come our way and it’s up to us how we handle it and who we look to in order to help us handle it.


About chronicchristian

I am a mother of 2 children who I realized not long ago I can't call "toddlers" anymore, married to the best man in the world for 12 years and chasing after what God wants for my life. I currently deal with some symptoms and have for the past 9 years, that resemble an autoimmune illness. Currently my own body is attacking my thyroid (seems it could find something better to do) and the doctors I've seen are at a loss as to what the plan might be. I believe God has the very best plan and that He is doing something awesome and she who guards her lips guards her life. This blog is good therapy. Maybe not for you, but definitely for me. God is good and I intend to prove it.

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