Creative Creation

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i’m so discouraged. i can’t feel anything but pain in my knees. they hurt to the point where I cry. And that’s uncommon for me. I don’t think it’s so much a pain thing, but more of a pity thing. pity for myself. isn’t that a pretty image? it’s 3 weeks until the 5K and i hurt walking from the kitchen to the chair. it’s these days that I am so tired of fighting, yet what else would we do? I know there are others out there that have it so much worse. i wish they were here right now. We could have a pity party.
God will come through for me. I will one day be a runner. I have wanted to run since I was little. It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with CFS that I went after that goal. Funny how it takes a real kick for us to get in gear with what we want out of life.
I love the feel of the sun on my face and the breeze. Running just takes you out of your head. I love that I can think or not think at all when i run. It’s not the same for walking. When you walk, you wave at people. You look at houses. You calm a barking dog.
When you run, you run. That is your focus. There’s no extra energy to wave at a passing car. There’s no time to glance around at the scenery—only to feel the scenery. God’s creative creation surrounding and enveloping your unsuspecting body. Your focus is on Him and your breathing. Left. Right. Left. Right. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget the ADD meds, running makes me focus on what’s truly important in life.
There will come a day very soon when I will be able to experience “feeling the scenery” for more than 1 minute at a time; and for that day, I will patiently and faithfully wait.

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About chronicchristian

I am a mother of 2 children who I realized not long ago I can't call "toddlers" anymore, married to the best man in the world for 12 years and chasing after what God wants for my life. I currently deal with some symptoms and have for the past 9 years, that resemble an autoimmune illness. Currently my own body is attacking my thyroid (seems it could find something better to do) and the doctors I've seen are at a loss as to what the plan might be. I believe God has the very best plan and that He is doing something awesome and she who guards her lips guards her life. This blog is good therapy. Maybe not for you, but definitely for me. God is good and I intend to prove it.

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